can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
