I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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