i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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