the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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