You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
i black out too much to be "responsible"
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
