scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
