So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
These 21 Drunks Said The Darndest Things
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.