I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Randomize
