just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Randomize