imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
