I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
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do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
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he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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