i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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