saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
