oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
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A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
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The car smells like weed is an understatement.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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