um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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