I only kidnapped one of them. chill
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize