Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize