i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
i think my cat just said my name.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Randomize
