K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
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