oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
