Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize
