Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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