My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
