If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
