dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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