If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
