Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
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