He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize
