please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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