Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
