Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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