CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
