what if I'm pregnant?
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
29 Married People Share What They Used To Find Cute About Their SO—But Now Find Infuriating
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.