then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Randomize