Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Randomize
