We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
