i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Randomize