But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Randomize
