i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize