Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
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