Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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