Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
