I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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