Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Randomize
