we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Randomize
