1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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