you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
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