hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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