Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize