That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I smell stomach acid.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Randomize
