I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
